Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
Prison as a loss making company
Every company tries to earn to make profits. That is central to a thriving economy. Either through new products or efficient operations/services the costs are cut down and then cheaper cost products or services are offered. That is how competition picks out the best providers and the others either learn lessons and move into other sectors or further improve the current best efficiency through their innovation.
The quality of the service or the product and the use for those are the most important factors to decide whether the business will be successful or not. No one would want to buy defective pieces because often the repeated purchase of defective pieces exceeds the cost of a single purchase of a good quality product or service. In a capitalist economy profits are central. It is mutually to everyone's benefit to try and work on efficiency in their core strength. That way prices are driven downwards or kept the same while the quality of life improves.
Even though direct monetary profits is not the goal of the government the correct use of the tax (agreed individual contribution towards maintenance, improvement, etc) is and should always be. If that is not done correctly, then it is as good as a loss making company.
Let us consider prisoners. Let us start analyzing from the time they somehow get into the prison without belaboring and debating on the causes of their incarceration. They got there for having committed some crime. That crime may have been out of compulsion or force or lack of awareness or sheer mental disturbance. Never mind that. While in prison the typical reaction, initially, of a prisoner is denial or withdrawal. Everything seems unjust or incorrect. Some even harbor escape plans. Gradually reality sinks in. He realizes that the prison walls around him are no illusion. He realizes that he could keep whining for the rest of the term - very likely around 10 to 15 years - or do something useful.
If he chooses the former it is bad because he will easily be a negative energy carrier. He'll also join the negative forces and always be up to something nasty. What's worse? When he is released, not only does the social stigma around an imprisoned man deter him from landing an occupation to feed himself and his family but also the pent up negative energy can add to the misery and another crime may be committed without even a provocation. And then what happens? Very likely he is caught again and he is imprisoned again. Only this time it (the punishment) will be more severe because the ex-convict, apparently, didn't learn enough from the time served in the prison.
If he chooses the latter, good for him. But what useful things can he do? While in prison he can perhaps do a lot of helping around, maintaining the prison facilities and earn some money for his service. He could possibly learn some crafts or arts. But what good are most of these experiences when he is released? If he wants to get a job at a restaurant or at a post office or as a bus driver or a place where slightly higher skills, that come with a higher education, are needed? Shops may not employ him because of the mistrust they may have? "Who knows if he is completely corrected or not? What if he loots my shop?" The losses from even small crimes can be a lot to bear for a local shop owner. And to aspire for jobs requiring more skill, like a receptionist or a computer repairman or a web developer or a call center or data entry operator he simply doesn't have requisite skills and the employers would rather get someone who is almost employable than to take the pains of training such n ex-convict.
Now what happens? He is left with no job! He is a human after all. He has to feed himself and maybe his family. Any guesses for the extent he may go to to survive? Of course the more idle time he spends the more negative energy can build up and then we're only being foolish in expecting no blast. So what is the use of a prison that only just temporarily shields the public from the dangerous/unstable elements? They need money to offer the public this service. That money is from tax, remember? Given the total population of the world, at any time there are people released into the world form prisons and there are some that are put in. So it is indeed only a temporary shielding place.
Now if we view the ex-convict (who completed his term in prison) as a product, if he returns to the prison for some reason, isn't it the same as a defective product from a company? A company that makes defective products falls out or is shut down. What about a prison in our society?
If no attempt is made to reform individuals inside a prison and they are only merely treated as defective pieces from God we are only doing ourselves disservice and harm. The reformation can be through education offered, counseling services, spiritual empowerment and open houses where the prisoners talk about the mistakes they made and urge the people on the border to not take their route. It is possible. I know for certain that most people regret some bad things they did in life. Likewise prisoners too regret their mistakes and they can, more than anyone else can, identify the people - the minds that can be influenced (teens mostly) - who are on the verge of making decisions that they will regret in the future. We must use them as a feedback mechanism to improve our society. For that to happen, we must do enough inside our prisons, to reform the prisoners, and then make them reach out to people on the edge of a cliff, about to commit a crime.
If no attempt is made to reform the inmates a prison system is as much a failure as a badly performing company with dwindling stock prices. If anything a failed prison system is worse because more lives will adversely be affected with their products!
The quality of the service or the product and the use for those are the most important factors to decide whether the business will be successful or not. No one would want to buy defective pieces because often the repeated purchase of defective pieces exceeds the cost of a single purchase of a good quality product or service. In a capitalist economy profits are central. It is mutually to everyone's benefit to try and work on efficiency in their core strength. That way prices are driven downwards or kept the same while the quality of life improves.
In a small and ideal economy where everyone concentrates on their strengths there is no need for any regulations and laws. However even if there is an ideal economy, an entity as big as a nation cannot be treated as small. So there are popularly elected representatives whose tasks are to govern the region/nation and ensure everyone is able to concentrate on their tasks and improve the quality of life. The government should efficiently improve its governance and help keep with the overall goals of prosperity and happiness. The traders, craftsman and servicemen get their money from the goods and services they offer. The government employees need to get some money for their work too. That is tax. So a long story cut short, tax is everyone's mutual agreement and contribution towards the upkeep of and a better society.
Even though direct monetary profits is not the goal of the government the correct use of the tax (agreed individual contribution towards maintenance, improvement, etc) is and should always be. If that is not done correctly, then it is as good as a loss making company.
Let us consider prisoners. Let us start analyzing from the time they somehow get into the prison without belaboring and debating on the causes of their incarceration. They got there for having committed some crime. That crime may have been out of compulsion or force or lack of awareness or sheer mental disturbance. Never mind that. While in prison the typical reaction, initially, of a prisoner is denial or withdrawal. Everything seems unjust or incorrect. Some even harbor escape plans. Gradually reality sinks in. He realizes that the prison walls around him are no illusion. He realizes that he could keep whining for the rest of the term - very likely around 10 to 15 years - or do something useful.
If he chooses the former it is bad because he will easily be a negative energy carrier. He'll also join the negative forces and always be up to something nasty. What's worse? When he is released, not only does the social stigma around an imprisoned man deter him from landing an occupation to feed himself and his family but also the pent up negative energy can add to the misery and another crime may be committed without even a provocation. And then what happens? Very likely he is caught again and he is imprisoned again. Only this time it (the punishment) will be more severe because the ex-convict, apparently, didn't learn enough from the time served in the prison.
If he chooses the latter, good for him. But what useful things can he do? While in prison he can perhaps do a lot of helping around, maintaining the prison facilities and earn some money for his service. He could possibly learn some crafts or arts. But what good are most of these experiences when he is released? If he wants to get a job at a restaurant or at a post office or as a bus driver or a place where slightly higher skills, that come with a higher education, are needed? Shops may not employ him because of the mistrust they may have? "Who knows if he is completely corrected or not? What if he loots my shop?" The losses from even small crimes can be a lot to bear for a local shop owner. And to aspire for jobs requiring more skill, like a receptionist or a computer repairman or a web developer or a call center or data entry operator he simply doesn't have requisite skills and the employers would rather get someone who is almost employable than to take the pains of training such n ex-convict.
Now what happens? He is left with no job! He is a human after all. He has to feed himself and maybe his family. Any guesses for the extent he may go to to survive? Of course the more idle time he spends the more negative energy can build up and then we're only being foolish in expecting no blast. So what is the use of a prison that only just temporarily shields the public from the dangerous/unstable elements? They need money to offer the public this service. That money is from tax, remember? Given the total population of the world, at any time there are people released into the world form prisons and there are some that are put in. So it is indeed only a temporary shielding place.
Now if we view the ex-convict (who completed his term in prison) as a product, if he returns to the prison for some reason, isn't it the same as a defective product from a company? A company that makes defective products falls out or is shut down. What about a prison in our society?
If no attempt is made to reform individuals inside a prison and they are only merely treated as defective pieces from God we are only doing ourselves disservice and harm. The reformation can be through education offered, counseling services, spiritual empowerment and open houses where the prisoners talk about the mistakes they made and urge the people on the border to not take their route. It is possible. I know for certain that most people regret some bad things they did in life. Likewise prisoners too regret their mistakes and they can, more than anyone else can, identify the people - the minds that can be influenced (teens mostly) - who are on the verge of making decisions that they will regret in the future. We must use them as a feedback mechanism to improve our society. For that to happen, we must do enough inside our prisons, to reform the prisoners, and then make them reach out to people on the edge of a cliff, about to commit a crime.
If no attempt is made to reform the inmates a prison system is as much a failure as a badly performing company with dwindling stock prices. If anything a failed prison system is worse because more lives will adversely be affected with their products!
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Love in Ethiopia and its 'pullatlu'
I was excited about the new cuisine. So when Vinay suggested that we go to an Ethiopian place for his Birthday dinner I could barely hold myself from tearing my seat belts and jumping onto the Interstate and spreading my joy to the others. (I heard of the suggestion when I was still driving on I-94)
Ras Daschen was where we went. It is on 6846 N Broadway Av in Chicago. I reached there about 20 min earlier than the others. That gave me a chance to listen to some really fascinating and rejuvenating music by a live band.
I was engrossed in the music when I had a lady (waitress/manager) walk up to me and ask me if I wanted to sit down while I was waiting for my friends. And that is when I noticed another beautiful aspect of the restaurant (music being the first). That lady was beautiful and the first thing I thought to myself was that she was a direct descendent of Cleopatra. And then it didn't surprise me that Caesar had his second family there. If I am presented with a chance, I will have 100 families in Egypt, Ethiopia, Morocco etc. Her curly hair, typical of Africans, were bewitching. And her eyes... They were magic! Black magic! Only in this case the victim would love being one! And when the other waitress came up to me and inquired how I was and spoke a few things I was floored. I rued not being able to speak Ethiopian just to impress her. I was surprised that she even chuckled at some silly jokes that one attempts during pleasantries. And when that happened the music in the background played a wonderful catalyst to her movements. The beats on the African drums were so well timed that every beat met with her sashay as though they were trained in the military.
I had a good mind of begging her to break the step a bit, or else my heart would collapse from the hard pounding! My 20 min felt like 2 min when my friends arrived and I was hoping to be served by this soft killer. We weren't but the one who served us was charming too. A good 15 min into researching the menu and what each thing could mean, we were coming up with some suggestions for orders. We all sipped on tasteful, delectable, lip smacking Ethiopian beer, (selected by Venkat and me) first. Pavan seemed to start liking beer which was, to me, as pleasing as the sight of a baby's first steps to its mother.
Our orders consisted of some meat portions which Pavan and I didn't eat of course. We ordered vegetarian delicacies, the best of which, I thought, was Shirro! Injeras, the base item like Indian roti or rice, were strikingly similar in taste and appearance to an Andhra Pradesh delicacy (Pulla atlu/ Pullatlu - meaning sour crepes). Although I probably never had authentic pulla attu (singular for pulla atlu) Pavan's agreement to my claim gave me the confidence to put it in writing.
Once all the food arrived, we all were merry and gorging on the salivary-gland-tingling food! I let me eyes steal away to the next table where the swaying sashaying waitress was serving. "Those lucky ^&$((&*#", I thought! Our table was almost at the other end of the restaurant so that we couldn't have heard so much as an elephant trumpet, let alone a light strum of the live band's guitar. We asked that some music be played for us and they obliged. Pavan, again, seemed to be really fascinated by the music as were others. So I took my chance and gestured to that pretty woman. She came beaming all over. Was I stupid enough to just ask her to change the music to something that was played 5 min back? No!I was clever enough to use that chance to ask her questions about the music and get prolong her presence at our table. I was in a daze. It was either my heart or my words or just my imagination, but surely one of these was floating about in air like a happy feather. God! Why wasn't I an Ethiopian?
By the end of our meal we had plenty of food and music. Personally I could have done with more conversation with the above mentioned descendant of Helen of Troy and Cleopatra! Sadly I had to leave quickly lest my waiting friends curse me. Vinay would already be telling his sister - Deepti - (who would have probably asked her brother, "Why on Earth is he taking so long to come out?") that I was doing some gimmicks and chatting someone up. I had an occasion to chat with the owners of the restaurant and I paid my compliment to the very well presented restaurant, food and music.
Secretly I was also complimenting the other beautiful thing. I also told them how the injeras was very similar to pulla atlu and was hoping they'd tell me that Ethiopians and South Indians (Andhra Pradesh people particularly) were of one blood. In which case I was already making plans of calling up my parents with a view to suggest an alliance!
On my way out I showered praises to the musicians who were happy to point me to the website I mentioned above. My opinions are not biased because of the beautiful waitress but I would recommend Ras Daschen to everyone who love the delicious cuisine, rejuvenating music and the beautiful things in life. (On a similar note, I also understand that I could believe the stock analysts who write a disclaimer saying that they do not hold any stocks of the analyzed company.) I am certainly going there on my next trip to Chicago.
And if you go there you'll love it anyway, but I'd recommend you to go with your chums like I did. It would only make for one of the best memories you've had in life.
Ras Daschen was where we went. It is on 6846 N Broadway Av in Chicago. I reached there about 20 min earlier than the others. That gave me a chance to listen to some really fascinating and rejuvenating music by a live band.
I was engrossed in the music when I had a lady (waitress/manager) walk up to me and ask me if I wanted to sit down while I was waiting for my friends. And that is when I noticed another beautiful aspect of the restaurant (music being the first). That lady was beautiful and the first thing I thought to myself was that she was a direct descendent of Cleopatra. And then it didn't surprise me that Caesar had his second family there. If I am presented with a chance, I will have 100 families in Egypt, Ethiopia, Morocco etc. Her curly hair, typical of Africans, were bewitching. And her eyes... They were magic! Black magic! Only in this case the victim would love being one! And when the other waitress came up to me and inquired how I was and spoke a few things I was floored. I rued not being able to speak Ethiopian just to impress her. I was surprised that she even chuckled at some silly jokes that one attempts during pleasantries. And when that happened the music in the background played a wonderful catalyst to her movements. The beats on the African drums were so well timed that every beat met with her sashay as though they were trained in the military.
I had a good mind of begging her to break the step a bit, or else my heart would collapse from the hard pounding! My 20 min felt like 2 min when my friends arrived and I was hoping to be served by this soft killer. We weren't but the one who served us was charming too. A good 15 min into researching the menu and what each thing could mean, we were coming up with some suggestions for orders. We all sipped on tasteful, delectable, lip smacking Ethiopian beer, (selected by Venkat and me) first. Pavan seemed to start liking beer which was, to me, as pleasing as the sight of a baby's first steps to its mother.
Our orders consisted of some meat portions which Pavan and I didn't eat of course. We ordered vegetarian delicacies, the best of which, I thought, was Shirro! Injeras, the base item like Indian roti or rice, were strikingly similar in taste and appearance to an Andhra Pradesh delicacy (Pulla atlu/ Pullatlu - meaning sour crepes). Although I probably never had authentic pulla attu (singular for pulla atlu) Pavan's agreement to my claim gave me the confidence to put it in writing.
Once all the food arrived, we all were merry and gorging on the salivary-gland-tingling food! I let me eyes steal away to the next table where the swaying sashaying waitress was serving. "Those lucky ^&$((&*#", I thought! Our table was almost at the other end of the restaurant so that we couldn't have heard so much as an elephant trumpet, let alone a light strum of the live band's guitar. We asked that some music be played for us and they obliged. Pavan, again, seemed to be really fascinated by the music as were others. So I took my chance and gestured to that pretty woman. She came beaming all over. Was I stupid enough to just ask her to change the music to something that was played 5 min back? No!I was clever enough to use that chance to ask her questions about the music and get prolong her presence at our table. I was in a daze. It was either my heart or my words or just my imagination, but surely one of these was floating about in air like a happy feather. God! Why wasn't I an Ethiopian?
By the end of our meal we had plenty of food and music. Personally I could have done with more conversation with the above mentioned descendant of Helen of Troy and Cleopatra! Sadly I had to leave quickly lest my waiting friends curse me. Vinay would already be telling his sister - Deepti - (who would have probably asked her brother, "Why on Earth is he taking so long to come out?") that I was doing some gimmicks and chatting someone up. I had an occasion to chat with the owners of the restaurant and I paid my compliment to the very well presented restaurant, food and music.Secretly I was also complimenting the other beautiful thing. I also told them how the injeras was very similar to pulla atlu and was hoping they'd tell me that Ethiopians and South Indians (Andhra Pradesh people particularly) were of one blood. In which case I was already making plans of calling up my parents with a view to suggest an alliance!
On my way out I showered praises to the musicians who were happy to point me to the website I mentioned above. My opinions are not biased because of the beautiful waitress but I would recommend Ras Daschen to everyone who love the delicious cuisine, rejuvenating music and the beautiful things in life. (On a similar note, I also understand that I could believe the stock analysts who write a disclaimer saying that they do not hold any stocks of the analyzed company.) I am certainly going there on my next trip to Chicago.
And if you go there you'll love it anyway, but I'd recommend you to go with your chums like I did. It would only make for one of the best memories you've had in life.
Monday, February 20, 2012
If cricket is my religion I am a blasphemer
Given the content that is to follow, I find it comfortable to put this disclaimer right at the beginning than at the end, which may not even be reached by many, if not most.
Disclaimer: I am agnostic and generally allow for a lot of questioning. I take good answers but also play devil's advocate often, just to get people to think hard. This article is not my way of imposing my uniqueness or rebellious attitude or an attempt to gain attention from such a popular topic. So if you are about to leave a comment, please feel free to do so but remember what I said above.
For an aspiring Indian cricket fan perhaps there were 2 good times to start following the game - 1) just before 1983 and 2) just around 1991. The former marking not only significant as India's first World Cup win but also as minnows beating giants and the first time a non West Indian team won a world cup.
The latter marking the increasing popularity and rising number of gasps and utterances of a name as a big talent - Sachin Tendulkar.
I remember beginning to follow cricket from 1993 (Hero Cup) and vague memories of India thrashing England in a home test series under Azharuddin. I remember cheering 2 players more than anyone else -Sachin and Azhar. Nothing would have excited me to watch a game of test cricket more than the sight of the 2 of them playing together. I even remember the days when they'd move the camera from the wicket keeper to the slips and you'd see the following order (always) - Azhar, Sachin and Kapil. Something about that gave a very secure feeling (not to the opposition) to a fan.
Come 1996 World Cup, a storm of enthusiasm was brewing about India's chances to win the cup. It was a home tournament and we didn't really start badly. Never mind the Semi final now. In fact both the games against Sri Lanka started with Jayasuriya and Kaluwitharana back in the pavilion in the first over. And yet we lost. In any case the (now) apple of our eyes - Sachin - was the man of the series and he seemed to be talking only centuries through his bat.
From then to now, nothing changed. Through thick and thin, through rough patches and great form, through all scandals around him, he maintained his superiority. Not just in the team but elsewhere. Around 1998 bowlers bowling to him were all converted to insomniacs. He was a terror, although all of it was through his bat. Never was he aggressive. Never did he show dissent against umpires ghastly errors. The some times he did do that was more of cursing his own fate than the umpire. No child could have learned from him and become a bad sportsman.
He went on to break records before creating some of his own. These, currently look so unachievable by anyone else for eons to come, that they deserve a separate adjective than Bradmanesque. For all of the 90s it would be fair to him to say he carried the team on his shoulders. For a country that seemed to stop producing Superheroes since the mythological times (Krishna, Rama etc) Sachin was a proud creation/possession. He was our answer to Spiderman, Superman, etc. When he took off his helmet, raised his bat and looked up it meant India was going to win (more often than not). When even his centuries couldn't help gain victories (Test match against Pakistan, Sharjah tournament, World cup '96 group match against Sri Lanka, etc) the fans stopped expecting India to win. Instead they found a new event to look forward to - Sachin scoring centuries. It soon became a ritual which had lost its meaning through generations. Fans started celebrating the fact that he was a terror to bowlers from other countries. "Well! No one can take that from us!" they'd say to themselves in schools, offices, dhabas, outside television showrooms or any shop that had a television showing a cricket match.
With the arrival of Sourav Ganguly, the team not only got rid of its bugbear (match-fixing) but also shed its skin to be seen as a fighting team with winning as its quest. Fans now had other things to cheer about too. Other players to keep track of too. With the others often chipping in, the pressure on Sachin to perform in a do or die cause reduces and soon became non-applicable. In a phase where Sehwag was very consistent (mind you, his test average is still above 50 and for his strike rate, I needn't say more) I'd actually switch off my tv when Sehwag got out and I'd wonder how 'those' days were when Sachin getting out meant the game was over. This happened even as lately as in 2002. (Remember the Natwest final against England - 143/5 with Sachin out, India would have instantly experienced a plunge in electricity consumption!)
We started winning games more and more consistently with the rise of more and more individual match-winners. With the passage of time, akin to ripening of fruits and aging of wine, our batting order, the envy of the world was supposed to be more and more impregnable and unbeatable. You'd expect individuals visiting a foreign country for a test tour for the nth time in their careers; the very ones whose individual batting records would beat some lower ranked teams, would by now get so invincible that experienced bowling line-ups, let alone younger ones, would have nightmares about getting the team all-out.
For a fan like me, it was extremely disappointing to have won the tour in West Indies only 1-0. Losing to England 4-0 was a shame for the reasons mentioned above. Then coming back to home soil, we beat West Indies only 2-0 (where a 3-0 was doable)... It was very uneasy to see these performances. Optimists and those let-these-go-sayers would bring up a variety of arguments. Some of them included calling other teams "not the best". That, to me, still didn't justify India's shabby batting performances. I'll agree that we have had our problems with bowling teams out and so winning tests (and ODIs against strong batting units) was going to be difficult. Add to those problems BCCI's follies like 'attempting to prepare sporty pitches' which eventually would turn out to be neither turners nor bouncy but dead.
With Ganguly (weakest of the big 5 that we boasted through most of early 2000s) gone the other 4 had to carry on for some time as we slowly inducted younger players to play alongside the living legends, learn a few lessons about batting and not-losing if not winning. So late in 2011 New Zealand drew the test series 1-1 and announced that Australia was suspect against swing bowling. Memories from Steve Waugh's last series flashed and it seemed all correct, the way Zaheer and Irfan Pathan extracted wickets through swing. Hopes of the first ever series win in Australia were brimming. The new finds Umesh Yadav and Varun Aaron augmenting the already blooded Ishant and wise and crafty Zaheer meant that this was the first time our bowling was going to feel at home in Australia.
If winning, for some reason - like Ponting's getting back to form, Clarke stealing the thunder, viral flu attacking all Indian batsmen - was difficult, at least drawing tests this time was supposed to be walks in the parks. What happened then? How did we not manage to save a single test? The only ray of hope came out to be Virat Kohli! His 50 on a Perth wicket where everyone else failed showed promise. That's all!
Is it wrong to feel cheated now? 4 biggies whose experience put together is unbeatable by a whole squad of most other teams failed us yet again! Well, even if they had won us some series here and there, the loss this time was unacceptable. Why? Of course it was not acceptable because if we lost with such players, how could we hope to win series in the near future with all 4 (realistically) close to retirement. 2 of them are already out of the ODI and T20 squads so there is no debate on that front.
So when I, as a fan, wish and pray that Sachin retires, am I a blasphemer? Part of why I specifically am mentioning him is that the others have come to be ignored anyway. I don't want to get into statistical belaboring. I take my hats off to all that he has done. Now with the 100th 100 becoming the new craze nothing else seems to matter - not winning, not even a fighting performance. We are ready to tolerate a poor performance if Sachin would get his 100th 100. That is not acceptable for me. I think he has a lot of records and even has a World Cup now. I'd have appreciated if he retired right then. But then it was ok for him to carry on. No harm... But to what extent?? Is it okay if he keeps gifting his wickets to newbies who weren't even born when he scored his first century? Is it okay if India keeps losing despite him in the team?
When a team does badly, the seniors are supposed to take responsibility. So NOW what is the problem in asking Sachin to take ownership? We're okay with Dravid being hanged to death, Laxman being lynched, Sehwag being tortured to death, we even pick on newcomers for not performing, but we let Sachin get away? Somewhere I believe it is this very attitude that lets, the wrong-doers get away in India, politicians continue to rape us day in and day out and we ask for more!
In my honest opinion Sachin should retire. (Of course who am I to decide? No one. In fact if I had the power to decide there would have been no need to 2nd guess what he'd be doing by now.) If this was even a few years ago, I wouldn't have said all this and I didn't. There was his very lean patch years ago and I was praying for him to recover. Not now! As a well-wisher for Indian team I want one slot in the team to be unblocked for a youngster who, inspired by Sachin, could attempt to get close to his stature (if as most would say no one can ever be Sachin) soon and carry the baton forward. In a country with so much of talent I find it hard to understand the extra lenience being showered on a lost cause. And for those who are trying to convince yourselves or others that records don't matter to him I will feel scared for your gullibility. Not like it is bad to have such ambitions but don't preach about his altruistic and selfless intentions! At the end of the day he gets paid for what he is doing. He hasn;t been playing for free, you know? If he were really selfless and patriotic he'd have perhaps given IPL lesser priority than some tours he didn't go on.
To me the breaking point was first the England tour where I refused to take any excuse for the defeat and then the Australia tour. I think my prayer that all 4 biggies quit is fair. I also know that these prayers will not meet with any resistance for 3 of them but for the 4th one I'll even get death threats. That is what riles me and I hope people see the fan's cry in this tirade more than a random rambling and a trigger for a statistical war.
Please Sachin! Go while we still have time to recover from our wounds!
Disclaimer: I am agnostic and generally allow for a lot of questioning. I take good answers but also play devil's advocate often, just to get people to think hard. This article is not my way of imposing my uniqueness or rebellious attitude or an attempt to gain attention from such a popular topic. So if you are about to leave a comment, please feel free to do so but remember what I said above.
For an aspiring Indian cricket fan perhaps there were 2 good times to start following the game - 1) just before 1983 and 2) just around 1991. The former marking not only significant as India's first World Cup win but also as minnows beating giants and the first time a non West Indian team won a world cup.
The latter marking the increasing popularity and rising number of gasps and utterances of a name as a big talent - Sachin Tendulkar.
I remember beginning to follow cricket from 1993 (Hero Cup) and vague memories of India thrashing England in a home test series under Azharuddin. I remember cheering 2 players more than anyone else -Sachin and Azhar. Nothing would have excited me to watch a game of test cricket more than the sight of the 2 of them playing together. I even remember the days when they'd move the camera from the wicket keeper to the slips and you'd see the following order (always) - Azhar, Sachin and Kapil. Something about that gave a very secure feeling (not to the opposition) to a fan.
Come 1996 World Cup, a storm of enthusiasm was brewing about India's chances to win the cup. It was a home tournament and we didn't really start badly. Never mind the Semi final now. In fact both the games against Sri Lanka started with Jayasuriya and Kaluwitharana back in the pavilion in the first over. And yet we lost. In any case the (now) apple of our eyes - Sachin - was the man of the series and he seemed to be talking only centuries through his bat.
From then to now, nothing changed. Through thick and thin, through rough patches and great form, through all scandals around him, he maintained his superiority. Not just in the team but elsewhere. Around 1998 bowlers bowling to him were all converted to insomniacs. He was a terror, although all of it was through his bat. Never was he aggressive. Never did he show dissent against umpires ghastly errors. The some times he did do that was more of cursing his own fate than the umpire. No child could have learned from him and become a bad sportsman.
He went on to break records before creating some of his own. These, currently look so unachievable by anyone else for eons to come, that they deserve a separate adjective than Bradmanesque. For all of the 90s it would be fair to him to say he carried the team on his shoulders. For a country that seemed to stop producing Superheroes since the mythological times (Krishna, Rama etc) Sachin was a proud creation/possession. He was our answer to Spiderman, Superman, etc. When he took off his helmet, raised his bat and looked up it meant India was going to win (more often than not). When even his centuries couldn't help gain victories (Test match against Pakistan, Sharjah tournament, World cup '96 group match against Sri Lanka, etc) the fans stopped expecting India to win. Instead they found a new event to look forward to - Sachin scoring centuries. It soon became a ritual which had lost its meaning through generations. Fans started celebrating the fact that he was a terror to bowlers from other countries. "Well! No one can take that from us!" they'd say to themselves in schools, offices, dhabas, outside television showrooms or any shop that had a television showing a cricket match.
With the arrival of Sourav Ganguly, the team not only got rid of its bugbear (match-fixing) but also shed its skin to be seen as a fighting team with winning as its quest. Fans now had other things to cheer about too. Other players to keep track of too. With the others often chipping in, the pressure on Sachin to perform in a do or die cause reduces and soon became non-applicable. In a phase where Sehwag was very consistent (mind you, his test average is still above 50 and for his strike rate, I needn't say more) I'd actually switch off my tv when Sehwag got out and I'd wonder how 'those' days were when Sachin getting out meant the game was over. This happened even as lately as in 2002. (Remember the Natwest final against England - 143/5 with Sachin out, India would have instantly experienced a plunge in electricity consumption!)
We started winning games more and more consistently with the rise of more and more individual match-winners. With the passage of time, akin to ripening of fruits and aging of wine, our batting order, the envy of the world was supposed to be more and more impregnable and unbeatable. You'd expect individuals visiting a foreign country for a test tour for the nth time in their careers; the very ones whose individual batting records would beat some lower ranked teams, would by now get so invincible that experienced bowling line-ups, let alone younger ones, would have nightmares about getting the team all-out.
For a fan like me, it was extremely disappointing to have won the tour in West Indies only 1-0. Losing to England 4-0 was a shame for the reasons mentioned above. Then coming back to home soil, we beat West Indies only 2-0 (where a 3-0 was doable)... It was very uneasy to see these performances. Optimists and those let-these-go-sayers would bring up a variety of arguments. Some of them included calling other teams "not the best". That, to me, still didn't justify India's shabby batting performances. I'll agree that we have had our problems with bowling teams out and so winning tests (and ODIs against strong batting units) was going to be difficult. Add to those problems BCCI's follies like 'attempting to prepare sporty pitches' which eventually would turn out to be neither turners nor bouncy but dead.
With Ganguly (weakest of the big 5 that we boasted through most of early 2000s) gone the other 4 had to carry on for some time as we slowly inducted younger players to play alongside the living legends, learn a few lessons about batting and not-losing if not winning. So late in 2011 New Zealand drew the test series 1-1 and announced that Australia was suspect against swing bowling. Memories from Steve Waugh's last series flashed and it seemed all correct, the way Zaheer and Irfan Pathan extracted wickets through swing. Hopes of the first ever series win in Australia were brimming. The new finds Umesh Yadav and Varun Aaron augmenting the already blooded Ishant and wise and crafty Zaheer meant that this was the first time our bowling was going to feel at home in Australia.
If winning, for some reason - like Ponting's getting back to form, Clarke stealing the thunder, viral flu attacking all Indian batsmen - was difficult, at least drawing tests this time was supposed to be walks in the parks. What happened then? How did we not manage to save a single test? The only ray of hope came out to be Virat Kohli! His 50 on a Perth wicket where everyone else failed showed promise. That's all!
Is it wrong to feel cheated now? 4 biggies whose experience put together is unbeatable by a whole squad of most other teams failed us yet again! Well, even if they had won us some series here and there, the loss this time was unacceptable. Why? Of course it was not acceptable because if we lost with such players, how could we hope to win series in the near future with all 4 (realistically) close to retirement. 2 of them are already out of the ODI and T20 squads so there is no debate on that front.
So when I, as a fan, wish and pray that Sachin retires, am I a blasphemer? Part of why I specifically am mentioning him is that the others have come to be ignored anyway. I don't want to get into statistical belaboring. I take my hats off to all that he has done. Now with the 100th 100 becoming the new craze nothing else seems to matter - not winning, not even a fighting performance. We are ready to tolerate a poor performance if Sachin would get his 100th 100. That is not acceptable for me. I think he has a lot of records and even has a World Cup now. I'd have appreciated if he retired right then. But then it was ok for him to carry on. No harm... But to what extent?? Is it okay if he keeps gifting his wickets to newbies who weren't even born when he scored his first century? Is it okay if India keeps losing despite him in the team?
When a team does badly, the seniors are supposed to take responsibility. So NOW what is the problem in asking Sachin to take ownership? We're okay with Dravid being hanged to death, Laxman being lynched, Sehwag being tortured to death, we even pick on newcomers for not performing, but we let Sachin get away? Somewhere I believe it is this very attitude that lets, the wrong-doers get away in India, politicians continue to rape us day in and day out and we ask for more!
In my honest opinion Sachin should retire. (Of course who am I to decide? No one. In fact if I had the power to decide there would have been no need to 2nd guess what he'd be doing by now.) If this was even a few years ago, I wouldn't have said all this and I didn't. There was his very lean patch years ago and I was praying for him to recover. Not now! As a well-wisher for Indian team I want one slot in the team to be unblocked for a youngster who, inspired by Sachin, could attempt to get close to his stature (if as most would say no one can ever be Sachin) soon and carry the baton forward. In a country with so much of talent I find it hard to understand the extra lenience being showered on a lost cause. And for those who are trying to convince yourselves or others that records don't matter to him I will feel scared for your gullibility. Not like it is bad to have such ambitions but don't preach about his altruistic and selfless intentions! At the end of the day he gets paid for what he is doing. He hasn;t been playing for free, you know? If he were really selfless and patriotic he'd have perhaps given IPL lesser priority than some tours he didn't go on.
To me the breaking point was first the England tour where I refused to take any excuse for the defeat and then the Australia tour. I think my prayer that all 4 biggies quit is fair. I also know that these prayers will not meet with any resistance for 3 of them but for the 4th one I'll even get death threats. That is what riles me and I hope people see the fan's cry in this tirade more than a random rambling and a trigger for a statistical war.
Please Sachin! Go while we still have time to recover from our wounds!
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Scent of a woman - morning after version
Dazed, I wake up, morning after!
Straightening every nerve - each a drifter.
I am not, definitely, Al Pacino!
Yet, dance with her was eventful as El Nino!
All I have is the scent of her hands.
Bewitching, as witches and their wands!
Every word exchanged, in memory, is etched.
Forever, the dance, on heart's canvas is sketched!
Straightening every nerve - each a drifter.
I am not, definitely, Al Pacino!
Yet, dance with her was eventful as El Nino!
All I have is the scent of her hands.
Bewitching, as witches and their wands!
Every word exchanged, in memory, is etched.
Forever, the dance, on heart's canvas is sketched!
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Myth Ya Right! Awards
Thank you all for the encouragement of our efforts to put up what was Mithya's biggest production so far!
Personally I feel a big void in life because there is nothing to do. (Of course there is work, there are chores, activities here and there, but NO Practice! No time to while away anymore!) It is upsetting! For about 40 days or more the Mithya group has been involved in coming together and put up a play as serious, as intense and as big as this one. Is there any wonder, then, that there should be many memories attached to this play?
Now, I may write a mushy narrative of experiences during the play in future but for now, here is my tribute to all those involved in the play. I'll call them Myth Ya Right! Awards - more for the contortion of the original word than for lack of better names like Awards... (Only some find a mention but that is only because of my frequent interaction with them.)
The award for best:
Lighting: Saptarshi Bandyopadhyay - Not as much for stage lights and related labor as for displaying a kid-like glint in his eyes when he found a trolley on which he could stand and move about. Together with Sonal Mithal he successfully blared strong lights into everyone's eyes. No surprise then that he'd done something to cause the audiences to have tears in their eyes. At the sets he'd often climb up the ladder at the drop of a hat to stand right next to intense lights. He'd then pick a person to talk to, call him/her, the person would look up, and... well... profanity would follow!
His dedication to serious work would come to the fore when someone would mention food! From that mention to the time food was with him, he'd be serious about work. Then he'd get back to his buffoonery, often sounding like Sourav Ganguly!
Music: Ganesan, Nachiket and Usman - for successfully preparing actors and cue masters for SNAFUs or bloopers on stage. It was only one day before the actual play that they realized they weren't composing for a spoof. Until then they'd take turns to deliberately mistime the sound cues. It wasn't until the last show that everyone realized how much that helped the actors develop a knack for maintaining calm in the event of an actual F&&& up! Must be geniuses! About the music pieces, Usman was stunned to learn that he wasn't composing for Coke Studio or Atif Aslam's latest album!
Cue Manager (sound and light box): Sonal Mithal - After auditioning people for that role she only thought it morally improper to take up the lead role. So she decided to be the production manager. (Besides no one had the patience to appease Mithya's president should she fuss and cry over something!) One of the key hands behind making the Uncle look shabby, she'd not suggest a rockstar kind of costumes for the uncle! If the music and light folks were not bungling, it was Sonal who'd deliberately mislead Jay and others. That explains the nothing that was done on the first day the theater was handed to Mithya! Her fascination for fancy equipment overcame her and she used that whole day to play her version of PS3! Together with Saptarshi she'd create the occasional halos around actors under the pretext of faulty equipment!
Cue Master: Jay Chheda - For bungling Uncle Vinay's cues until even the final dress rehearsal. Sources say that he did that deliberately to have my on-stage presence to as minimum a time as possible! Sources also say that the director suggested this. After the award, I re-christen him to "Q (Kyu)Master?" He also gets the award for best backstage management because he had a very Old Parsi Pappa look a la Munnabhai MBBS! Some actors claim to have heard him say to himself between cues "Rani to pappani!" An actor complained in private that Jay's hastening between scenes nearly caused a dressing blooper that'd have caused nightmares to the on-lookers. Esp Mala Kathhhri!Also nominated and nearly won the award for Mr Consistent performer for having mimed Paperwallahs gay actions on all 3 shows from behind the stage! He only lost the award because he lost control of the backstage crew every time he did that. (Hard to get people to work when they're rolling on their stomachs!)
Make-up artist/Shadow actress: Sarah Brown - for working hard on make-up and doubling up as backstage crew as well as shadow of Mala! Her skills were more in the way she disguised her nervousness to show Mala's shyness/discomfort and reluctance at the psychiatrist's office! Rumors have it that she was the brain behind what is accepted as the Asst Director's master stroke of tiring/stressing the actors! She had minimum work to do then, but maximum credit for the make-up. Her item dances during practices earned her the sobriquet of "Gulaabon". Her ability to learn fast was demonstrated through her quick usages of un-parliamentary words in Hindi! Gulaabon delicately lent herself to the production work too. Or so she made people believe! No one realized her scheme of pointing to her shadow appearance as a reason for not doing much work. An actor under conditions of anonymity confessed that Gulaabon would just sit in the blue light backstage. He shudders at the thought of being revealed to her, lest he gets to hear her full range vocabulary in Hindi!
Publicity: Namita Narain and Ankit Chandra - Former (Namita) for bullying the actors into submission during interviews. But just when the actors realized they were being bullied, she'd sugar coat them with compliments and assurances to be natural on the cam. Flatter them with "You guys are amazing! I was always a tree in plays!" Word has it that she had to work on her bullying skills when despite all her efforts, there was a great turn-out for all 3 shows. We had to do something about the extra people that wanted to be let in... Her bullying worked wonders to hush up one actor who'd refuse to give up on his gimmicks! Always the one to add fire to fuel, she'd assure (false assurance) "setting up" between 2 people any time!
The latter (Ankit) more for publicizing his singing than directing all traffic to the latest play in the blog site until just the day before the 1st show. His altruism and efforts behind the stage were manifest in how he'd lend himself to the Asst Director as a favorite punch bag! His best contribution to publicity was to get his girlfriend to fly in from Pittsburgh. At the least that worked... His best production work was in getting food and thereby keeping perpetually hungry beings like Saptarshi interested in the play!
Director: Radha Venkatagiri - For being the Sonia Gandhi for her puppet (Sibin Mohan)! Her charm worked its way to new comers, one of whom would occasionally claim Radha to be his fiance instead of Radhika!
Also gets the award for assisting with the make-up (read: scrubbing faces and eyelids to redness/soreness). The important inspiration from her for everyone came when shed narrate fictitious tales of how she'd not get high at all and that she'd drink 10 shots and sue the liquor maker for making flavored water!
Assistant Director: Sibin Mohan - for his masterpiece when he came up with the idea to make the whole thing look natural. He is a Neo-director trying to make his mark but boy! His ploy to tire the headlights out of 2 actors such that they actually appear and act old (also tired) seemed to work wonders. Friends of the 2 actors who sat in the audience couldn't recognize them even days after the last show!
The stress was working on Mala Cuttery too except that Sibin, smartly, would pat her shoulder assuring that she was the best actress he ever worked with! It didn't work on Deepak because his mind was always on Hookah, Shayari and Liquor, not on the play! His best contribution was during those days that he wasn't in town for the practices!
He reportedly went on record saying that this was going to be his last play as a director. Pity the newcomers took that as a carrot tied to a stick. If only they'd known that that was what he mentioned last time too. The straight face that he puts it with often made onlookers think that he was Mithya's best actor so far!
Versatile actor: Mohin Khushani - for his versatile roles. His Looney Tunes-esque portrayal of the paperwallah, Sarkar-esque portrayal of the Barista and and Drunken-man-who-ain't-knows-the-difference-between-beer-and-wine portrayal of the Waiter wasn't what earned him the award. It was not even for his butt-thrusting a la Saurav Ganguly! His award was for wooing and accepting his co-star (a change from his days when he'd shudder at the thought of being seen with girls), for pretending to study for a fictitious exam when help was needed backstage and for his publicity interview. In fact the meaty part of his role was when he successfully held his chuckle and tried to seriously say that the person playing the Uncle was his favorite actor. To this day no one bought that, but hey he convinced himself! That is quality acting...
Junior artist/ Backstage intern: Dhruv Mehta - After his raunchy back massaging dance he'd slip into the production crew's dress code with more fuss than even Charlie Sheen could create! Dopey dance with wannabe accent seems to be the thing with Junior artists. They also refuse to share a dressing mirror/chair. He started the Junior Artists' rebellion in the dressing room but quietly led it from behind the Doofus-faced Khushani! Khushani would bark vehemently about how difficult it was to sit on a fellow Junior artist's lap during make-up etc. He'd create a ruckus in the dressing room, and when outside it, he'd look to show his non-existent cricketing prowess! Renuka, the jewelry designer and Nachiket's wife, held more sharp catches than Dhruv and Khushani put together!
Mr Nice guy/ soft spoken actor award: Aviral Jain - Coming from the village of La Mart-in-here he was always raised to leave enough room for the audience interpret the play in their own way! Very good practice except when it comes to saying one's dialogues so softly that the audience cannot hear anything, thereby leaving no choice but to imagine/extrapolate those lines!
His only line in the play (he used often) that made sense and men could readily associate with and feel ever so emotional about was "What do you mean? This just doesn't make sense!" (said with a gawky expression...)
The nice guy bit is for promising intoxicants to the lead actresses but never doing it. Chivalry indeed! Sources suspect the low-voice-syndrome in the play was because of repeated stress of the throat (read gasp+gulp) every time he saw Strawberries & Cream in action (read Girl-on-girl)!
He definitely helped keep everyone's moral high by plugging in earplugs and listening to random stuff instead of reciting Shayaris or narrating stories from Luck-No or La Marts! (In which case it gave Sonal - Aviral's best audience - an excuse to not work despite her not needing one.)
Actress/Glamdoll: Nisha Somnath - Every actor/actress in a given famous movie has a famous thing noted in it. Dharmendra for his "Yamla Pagla" dance and "Basanti in kutton ke saamne..." Amitabh for "Mera baap chor hai" Raj Kapoor for his right palm to the audience, light nod and Bambi eyes saying something like "Ok ji", Al Pacino's dance in "Scent of a woman", Yana Gupta's "Babuji" song.
Our Nisha has done it all. She oozed oomph through her high heels. That was the single major factor for her glamdoll tag. Her gait changed greatly with her skimpy and tight outfits, but not more than with the heels. A candid man in the audience wrote in his feedback, "Dear Mithya, all was ok! I loved everything about the play! But must you really have a horse to transport crew and actors from one side of the stage to the other?"
Her method acting must be lauded. She deliberately estranges her real life chemistry with her onstage mother and uncle so as to give her best performance. So what if despite that she couldn't act.
Her most noted lines/words in the play - "Eh! Did my scene with Spurr-tee come out well? I think it fell flat!"
"But how am I acting?" "Ehh I am not doing it well. Maybe you should find a better actress!" (Sibin's integrity was put to maximum test every time Nisha asked him for feedback on her acting. Best Director indeed!)
Words that really moved/reduced the co-actors to tears, "Deii! You are Deid! There is no Llleww for me! Lizzen!" (for Die! You are dead! There is no love for me! Listen!) (from sitting on chair to ROTFL, i.e.)
Upcoming star/Stacey's mom: Spurti Akki - for integrating her on-stage character into real life behavior. Every time a co-actor would ask her for coffee she'd readily peruse her lines from the play, "Huh? (and look lost)" Her peak acting was when she'd be upset over not being allowed to go to her "lab". (At the rate at which she was claiming things about her lab and/or work she should got either a Nobel Prize or an Oscar!)
Her portrayal of Mala's mother beat "Stacey's mom" by miles! People went gaga over her - not as much for her graceful looking saree as much for her impressions of old actresses in old songs.
Nisha's lines may or may not make her famous, but this starlet's lines "It is going to rain ALL NIGHT!" said no less than a million times by now will occupy the Mithya billboards for eons to come! In a given play her frustration (at the weather forecast not being heeded to) building up each time she said the line was impressive and definitely what made audiences go back home with a moral of the story! Last heard from sources, she was considering a career switch. She wants to replace Ravi Shastri as a cliche generator! (Both lines from the play and outside of it!)
She's taken to stardom like a Royal pig takes to a dirty sty! Last seen on the streets she was throwing tantrums about a spoon not being at the precise temperature in a restaurant and that it was hard for her to maintain her schedules with so many people interrupting her for autographs!
Best actress overall: Who said you needed to be on stage or in the whole movie to act? Anthony Hopkins won Oscar for a short duration in the film! Radhika is our such example. She went a step ahead. As an actor that never appeared, she mixed her emotions in an inimitable manner - romance, anger, catwalk, understanding and sharing & caring nature, etc!
Special thanks: Mehul Thakkar - for making his involvement with this play a minimum. With the feedback from the play and with more ideas, he is sure he can do better at that!
Personally I feel a big void in life because there is nothing to do. (Of course there is work, there are chores, activities here and there, but NO Practice! No time to while away anymore!) It is upsetting! For about 40 days or more the Mithya group has been involved in coming together and put up a play as serious, as intense and as big as this one. Is there any wonder, then, that there should be many memories attached to this play?
Now, I may write a mushy narrative of experiences during the play in future but for now, here is my tribute to all those involved in the play. I'll call them Myth Ya Right! Awards - more for the contortion of the original word than for lack of better names like
The award for best:
Lighting: Saptarshi Bandyopadhyay - Not as much for stage lights and related labor as for displaying a kid-like glint in his eyes when he found a trolley on which he could stand and move about. Together with Sonal Mithal he successfully blared strong lights into everyone's eyes. No surprise then that he'd done something to cause the audiences to have tears in their eyes. At the sets he'd often climb up the ladder at the drop of a hat to stand right next to intense lights. He'd then pick a person to talk to, call him/her, the person would look up, and... well... profanity would follow!
His dedication to serious work would come to the fore when someone would mention food! From that mention to the time food was with him, he'd be serious about work. Then he'd get back to his buffoonery, often sounding like Sourav Ganguly!
Music: Ganesan, Nachiket and Usman - for successfully preparing actors and cue masters for SNAFUs or bloopers on stage. It was only one day before the actual play that they realized they weren't composing for a spoof. Until then they'd take turns to deliberately mistime the sound cues. It wasn't until the last show that everyone realized how much that helped the actors develop a knack for maintaining calm in the event of an actual F&&& up! Must be geniuses! About the music pieces, Usman was stunned to learn that he wasn't composing for Coke Studio or Atif Aslam's latest album!
Cue Manager (sound and light box): Sonal Mithal - After auditioning people for that role she only thought it morally improper to take up the lead role. So she decided to be the production manager. (Besides no one had the patience to appease Mithya's president should she fuss and cry over something!) One of the key hands behind making the Uncle look shabby, she'd not suggest a rockstar kind of costumes for the uncle! If the music and light folks were not bungling, it was Sonal who'd deliberately mislead Jay and others. That explains the nothing that was done on the first day the theater was handed to Mithya! Her fascination for fancy equipment overcame her and she used that whole day to play her version of PS3! Together with Saptarshi she'd create the occasional halos around actors under the pretext of faulty equipment!
Cue Master: Jay Chheda - For bungling Uncle Vinay's cues until even the final dress rehearsal. Sources say that he did that deliberately to have my on-stage presence to as minimum a time as possible! Sources also say that the director suggested this. After the award, I re-christen him to "Q (Kyu)Master?" He also gets the award for best backstage management because he had a very Old Parsi Pappa look a la Munnabhai MBBS! Some actors claim to have heard him say to himself between cues "Rani to pappani!" An actor complained in private that Jay's hastening between scenes nearly caused a dressing blooper that'd have caused nightmares to the on-lookers. Esp Mala Kathhhri!Also nominated and nearly won the award for Mr Consistent performer for having mimed Paperwallahs gay actions on all 3 shows from behind the stage! He only lost the award because he lost control of the backstage crew every time he did that. (Hard to get people to work when they're rolling on their stomachs!)
Make-up artist/Shadow actress: Sarah Brown - for working hard on make-up and doubling up as backstage crew as well as shadow of Mala! Her skills were more in the way she disguised her nervousness to show Mala's shyness/discomfort and reluctance at the psychiatrist's office! Rumors have it that she was the brain behind what is accepted as the Asst Director's master stroke of tiring/stressing the actors! She had minimum work to do then, but maximum credit for the make-up. Her item dances during practices earned her the sobriquet of "Gulaabon". Her ability to learn fast was demonstrated through her quick usages of un-parliamentary words in Hindi! Gulaabon delicately lent herself to the production work too. Or so she made people believe! No one realized her scheme of pointing to her shadow appearance as a reason for not doing much work. An actor under conditions of anonymity confessed that Gulaabon would just sit in the blue light backstage. He shudders at the thought of being revealed to her, lest he gets to hear her full range vocabulary in Hindi!
Publicity: Namita Narain and Ankit Chandra - Former (Namita) for bullying the actors into submission during interviews. But just when the actors realized they were being bullied, she'd sugar coat them with compliments and assurances to be natural on the cam. Flatter them with "You guys are amazing! I was always a tree in plays!" Word has it that she had to work on her bullying skills when despite all her efforts, there was a great turn-out for all 3 shows. We had to do something about the extra people that wanted to be let in... Her bullying worked wonders to hush up one actor who'd refuse to give up on his gimmicks! Always the one to add fire to fuel, she'd assure (false assurance) "setting up" between 2 people any time!
The latter (Ankit) more for publicizing his singing than directing all traffic to the latest play in the blog site until just the day before the 1st show. His altruism and efforts behind the stage were manifest in how he'd lend himself to the Asst Director as a favorite punch bag! His best contribution to publicity was to get his girlfriend to fly in from Pittsburgh. At the least that worked... His best production work was in getting food and thereby keeping perpetually hungry beings like Saptarshi interested in the play!
Director: Radha Venkatagiri - For being the Sonia Gandhi for her puppet (Sibin Mohan)! Her charm worked its way to new comers, one of whom would occasionally claim Radha to be his fiance instead of Radhika!
Also gets the award for assisting with the make-up (read: scrubbing faces and eyelids to redness/soreness). The important inspiration from her for everyone came when shed narrate fictitious tales of how she'd not get high at all and that she'd drink 10 shots and sue the liquor maker for making flavored water!
The stress was working on Mala Cuttery too except that Sibin, smartly, would pat her shoulder assuring that she was the best actress he ever worked with! It didn't work on Deepak because his mind was always on Hookah, Shayari and Liquor, not on the play! His best contribution was during those days that he wasn't in town for the practices!
He reportedly went on record saying that this was going to be his last play as a director. Pity the newcomers took that as a carrot tied to a stick. If only they'd known that that was what he mentioned last time too. The straight face that he puts it with often made onlookers think that he was Mithya's best actor so far!
Versatile actor: Mohin Khushani - for his versatile roles. His Looney Tunes-esque portrayal of the paperwallah, Sarkar-esque portrayal of the Barista and and Drunken-man-who-ain't-knows-the-difference-between-beer-and-wine portrayal of the Waiter wasn't what earned him the award. It was not even for his butt-thrusting a la Saurav Ganguly! His award was for wooing and accepting his co-star (a change from his days when he'd shudder at the thought of being seen with girls), for pretending to study for a fictitious exam when help was needed backstage and for his publicity interview. In fact the meaty part of his role was when he successfully held his chuckle and tried to seriously say that the person playing the Uncle was his favorite actor. To this day no one bought that, but hey he convinced himself! That is quality acting...
Junior artist/ Backstage intern: Dhruv Mehta - After his raunchy back massaging dance he'd slip into the production crew's dress code with more fuss than even Charlie Sheen could create! Dopey dance with wannabe accent seems to be the thing with Junior artists. They also refuse to share a dressing mirror/chair. He started the Junior Artists' rebellion in the dressing room but quietly led it from behind the Doofus-faced Khushani! Khushani would bark vehemently about how difficult it was to sit on a fellow Junior artist's lap during make-up etc. He'd create a ruckus in the dressing room, and when outside it, he'd look to show his non-existent cricketing prowess! Renuka, the jewelry designer and Nachiket's wife, held more sharp catches than Dhruv and Khushani put together!
Mr Nice guy/ soft spoken actor award: Aviral Jain - Coming from the village of La Mart-in-here he was always raised to leave enough room for the audience interpret the play in their own way! Very good practice except when it comes to saying one's dialogues so softly that the audience cannot hear anything, thereby leaving no choice but to imagine/extrapolate those lines!
His only line in the play (he used often) that made sense and men could readily associate with and feel ever so emotional about was "What do you mean? This just doesn't make sense!" (said with a gawky expression...)
The nice guy bit is for promising intoxicants to the lead actresses but never doing it. Chivalry indeed! Sources suspect the low-voice-syndrome in the play was because of repeated stress of the throat (read gasp+gulp) every time he saw Strawberries & Cream in action (read Girl-on-girl)!
He definitely helped keep everyone's moral high by plugging in earplugs and listening to random stuff instead of reciting Shayaris or narrating stories from Luck-No or La Marts! (In which case it gave Sonal - Aviral's best audience - an excuse to not work despite her not needing one.)
Actress/Glamdoll: Nisha Somnath - Every actor/actress in a given famous movie has a famous thing noted in it. Dharmendra for his "Yamla Pagla" dance and "Basanti in kutton ke saamne..." Amitabh for "Mera baap chor hai" Raj Kapoor for his right palm to the audience, light nod and Bambi eyes saying something like "Ok ji", Al Pacino's dance in "Scent of a woman", Yana Gupta's "Babuji" song.
Our Nisha has done it all. She oozed oomph through her high heels. That was the single major factor for her glamdoll tag. Her gait changed greatly with her skimpy and tight outfits, but not more than with the heels. A candid man in the audience wrote in his feedback, "Dear Mithya, all was ok! I loved everything about the play! But must you really have a horse to transport crew and actors from one side of the stage to the other?"
Her method acting must be lauded. She deliberately estranges her real life chemistry with her onstage mother and uncle so as to give her best performance. So what if despite that she couldn't act.
Her most noted lines/words in the play - "Eh! Did my scene with Spurr-tee come out well? I think it fell flat!"
"But how am I acting?" "Ehh I am not doing it well. Maybe you should find a better actress!" (Sibin's integrity was put to maximum test every time Nisha asked him for feedback on her acting. Best Director indeed!)
Words that really moved/reduced the co-actors to tears, "Deii! You are Deid! There is no Llleww for me! Lizzen!" (for Die! You are dead! There is no love for me! Listen!) (from sitting on chair to ROTFL, i.e.)
Upcoming star/Stacey's mom: Spurti Akki - for integrating her on-stage character into real life behavior. Every time a co-actor would ask her for coffee she'd readily peruse her lines from the play, "Huh? (and look lost)" Her peak acting was when she'd be upset over not being allowed to go to her "lab". (At the rate at which she was claiming things about her lab and/or work she should got either a Nobel Prize or an Oscar!)
Her portrayal of Mala's mother beat "Stacey's mom" by miles! People went gaga over her - not as much for her graceful looking saree as much for her impressions of old actresses in old songs.
Nisha's lines may or may not make her famous, but this starlet's lines "It is going to rain ALL NIGHT!" said no less than a million times by now will occupy the Mithya billboards for eons to come! In a given play her frustration (at the weather forecast not being heeded to) building up each time she said the line was impressive and definitely what made audiences go back home with a moral of the story! Last heard from sources, she was considering a career switch. She wants to replace Ravi Shastri as a cliche generator! (Both lines from the play and outside of it!)
She's taken to stardom like a Royal pig takes to a dirty sty! Last seen on the streets she was throwing tantrums about a spoon not being at the precise temperature in a restaurant and that it was hard for her to maintain her schedules with so many people interrupting her for autographs!
Best actress overall: Who said you needed to be on stage or in the whole movie to act? Anthony Hopkins won Oscar for a short duration in the film! Radhika is our such example. She went a step ahead. As an actor that never appeared, she mixed her emotions in an inimitable manner - romance, anger, catwalk, understanding and sharing & caring nature, etc!
Special thanks: Mehul Thakkar - for making his involvement with this play a minimum. With the feedback from the play and with more ideas, he is sure he can do better at that!
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Danville Development
I was listening intently, nodding occasionally, trying to be normal and sensitive to them. I was trying to appear calm and normal. I wasn't sure if I was able to pull it off! Here I was, thinking I was a good actor, capable of masking my emotions, but I felt shabby!
I was in a class of "Civil Rights" course and there was a general discussion going on. At best a fairly aware, knowledgeable and analytical person, I was in awe of my classmates. I somehow felt awkward, filled with pity and yet strongly respectful of them. These were the inmates at the Danville prison. Black men of varying ages were discussing the Civil rights in the US between 1955 to 1970 with equanimity.
Those who were aged 45 plus were calm and oozed wisdom. The ones who seemed around my age had a zest in their eyes. In the eyes of Juan I saw lost opportunity, remorse and penance. That was what I saw. Maybe another person would have seen the zeal to learn the many things he can while at the Danville prison.
I glanced, observed and peered at the others too with a hope to see what insight I could gain into their lives - now and in the past - but the harder I tried the more I exposed myself. The deeper I looked into their eyes the more I felt like screaming out to the world, "Give them a chance!" They were better people than some of those who roam free and wild in the world! To think that they give themselves as bad examples to their kids, urging them to not follow on their paths, made me feel depths of the low feeling one gets when one is helpless and sad! I imagined a 'regular' father telling his son, "Behave well or you'll be like one of these prisoners!"
Now I turned focus to one of my classmates and imagined what he'd say to his kid!
The discussions in the room left me stimulated. People were ready to absorb what I had to offer. It was a place where ideas could float freely and everyone could assimilate them without restriction. Majid (Otis) said, "Democracy and Capitalism were conflicting." I couldn't stop admiring this bespectacled gentleman ever since that line.
Will, who sat next to me, explained how there were colored fountains back in those days. The ease with which this topic was being discussed, the ease with which he was explaining the idea to me and the readiness with which he was absorbing whatever I had to say about casteism in India was astounding. Majid was quick to point out the similarity between casteism and racism. I had, by then, eased into the home made by the prisoners for themselves. So much so that I quickly argued like I would with my friend, if he offended me!
In between classes, I was greeted by Anthony and he spent most of his break time interacting with me and asking me about my life. I only felt it was natural for me to ask him about his. "Fridays we have classes which we look forward to. We love to learn! We get college credit, too, for this. Tuesdays and Mondays we spend time reading books at the resource room. Some of us even go back to our cells and spend time thinking about their paper/thesis!" As if that, something more privileged students like me hardly ever did (concentrate so much on academics), wasn't enough I asked him, "And what do you do the rest of the week?"
"Oh nothing! We're in a prison, you know?"
"Uhh ummm..." At this point I momentarily felt embarrassed and uneasy! I didn't mean to offend him but somehow it registered that that question could've so easily disturbed him! But Anthony was ahead of me! He smiled and moved on telling me that I should share my knowledge in calculus and algebra with some of them. Or even paper writing... That simple act of his put me in awe of him! He didn't care to be offended with minor things. He even saw the humor in it. All he cared for was to interact with me and to thank me for taking time out to visit him.
They had welcomed me and other visitors like me to their place. Without their genial, warm, outreaching attitude towards us, I am sure we wouldn't have been able to call this one of our most enjoyable days in life - a sentiment echoed by every visitor unanimously!
I started the trip when the weather was bright, gently cold and still. I ended the trip with the weather breezy and chilly! My emotions and state of mind followed the weather pattern too. It was hard to not give in to the conversion of emotions to tears. I maintained my calm and nonchalance!
I learned important lessons and I wish to thank the inmates of the Danville Prison (Danville, IL) for making me a better person today!
I was in a class of "Civil Rights" course and there was a general discussion going on. At best a fairly aware, knowledgeable and analytical person, I was in awe of my classmates. I somehow felt awkward, filled with pity and yet strongly respectful of them. These were the inmates at the Danville prison. Black men of varying ages were discussing the Civil rights in the US between 1955 to 1970 with equanimity.
Those who were aged 45 plus were calm and oozed wisdom. The ones who seemed around my age had a zest in their eyes. In the eyes of Juan I saw lost opportunity, remorse and penance. That was what I saw. Maybe another person would have seen the zeal to learn the many things he can while at the Danville prison.
I glanced, observed and peered at the others too with a hope to see what insight I could gain into their lives - now and in the past - but the harder I tried the more I exposed myself. The deeper I looked into their eyes the more I felt like screaming out to the world, "Give them a chance!" They were better people than some of those who roam free and wild in the world! To think that they give themselves as bad examples to their kids, urging them to not follow on their paths, made me feel depths of the low feeling one gets when one is helpless and sad! I imagined a 'regular' father telling his son, "Behave well or you'll be like one of these prisoners!"
Now I turned focus to one of my classmates and imagined what he'd say to his kid!
The discussions in the room left me stimulated. People were ready to absorb what I had to offer. It was a place where ideas could float freely and everyone could assimilate them without restriction. Majid (Otis) said, "Democracy and Capitalism were conflicting." I couldn't stop admiring this bespectacled gentleman ever since that line.
Will, who sat next to me, explained how there were colored fountains back in those days. The ease with which this topic was being discussed, the ease with which he was explaining the idea to me and the readiness with which he was absorbing whatever I had to say about casteism in India was astounding. Majid was quick to point out the similarity between casteism and racism. I had, by then, eased into the home made by the prisoners for themselves. So much so that I quickly argued like I would with my friend, if he offended me!
In between classes, I was greeted by Anthony and he spent most of his break time interacting with me and asking me about my life. I only felt it was natural for me to ask him about his. "Fridays we have classes which we look forward to. We love to learn! We get college credit, too, for this. Tuesdays and Mondays we spend time reading books at the resource room. Some of us even go back to our cells and spend time thinking about their paper/thesis!" As if that, something more privileged students like me hardly ever did (concentrate so much on academics), wasn't enough I asked him, "And what do you do the rest of the week?"
"Oh nothing! We're in a prison, you know?"
"Uhh ummm..." At this point I momentarily felt embarrassed and uneasy! I didn't mean to offend him but somehow it registered that that question could've so easily disturbed him! But Anthony was ahead of me! He smiled and moved on telling me that I should share my knowledge in calculus and algebra with some of them. Or even paper writing... That simple act of his put me in awe of him! He didn't care to be offended with minor things. He even saw the humor in it. All he cared for was to interact with me and to thank me for taking time out to visit him.
They had welcomed me and other visitors like me to their place. Without their genial, warm, outreaching attitude towards us, I am sure we wouldn't have been able to call this one of our most enjoyable days in life - a sentiment echoed by every visitor unanimously!
I started the trip when the weather was bright, gently cold and still. I ended the trip with the weather breezy and chilly! My emotions and state of mind followed the weather pattern too. It was hard to not give in to the conversion of emotions to tears. I maintained my calm and nonchalance!
I learned important lessons and I wish to thank the inmates of the Danville Prison (Danville, IL) for making me a better person today!
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